Childhood aggression: causes, prevention methods, methods of combating it

Parents should know: aggressive behavior of a child at an early age is not only the norm, but also an element of the correct development of the nervous system. The main task of adults is to catch the moment when the emotions and behavior of their beloved child begin to get out of control. Excessively nervous behavior of a child prevents him from fully exploring the world around him, leads to difficulties in socialization. Let's try to distinguish healthy aggression from pathological.

Little aggressor: how to help a child

With the help of aggressive actions, small children try to express dissatisfaction, intolerance. They do not yet know how to control impulses, desires, and correctly express emotions. If a child is faced with misunderstanding, he is offended, angry, then it is easier for him to bite, scream, hit than to try to speak out, to get what he wants in a good way.

Nature has gifted people with different temperaments. As a rule, the level of aggression in children depends on this. Choleric, extremely emotional children find it more difficult to express themselves calmly. They are unable to control their ardor, like more balanced, quiet children, so they splash out their excess feelings in actions.

The peak of aggression occurs at the age of 18-36 months. This is due to the fact that the baby begins to defend his “I”, to test the waters for possible primacy, leadership in the family.

Children 1.5-3 are impatient - they do not want to wait, demand what they want right now, rarely share toys. If the baby is excited and speaks poorly, then it is a hundred times more difficult for him to convey his request to others.

For example, a child wants a toy:

• he is calm: he comes up, takes an adult by the hand, leads him to the toy;
• he is tired and nervous: he cries, hits, loudly demands a toy, pointing with his finger, refuses mom's hugs.

From birth to five years of age, parents should clearly establish rules for the child. It is at this age that behavior is formed, respect for adults and understanding in the family are laid. Never respond with aggression to an outburst of emotions in a toddler. You cannot physically punish a child who hit you. The best solution would be to pick up, hug, calm down, and explain that such behavior is unacceptable.

Teach the child to ask for what they want correctly using a playful performance, in which, for example, a teddy bear represents a child, and a larger bear represents a caring parent.

Tips for parents: how to prevent childhood aggression

1. Prevent physical violence in the family, do not punish with pain.

2. Reduce the noise level in the room (do not turn on loud music, movies, cartoons, do not speak in raised tones - this is tiring, excites the immature nervous system).

3. Prevent a surge of aggression - you know your little one better:

• don't go to the supermarket with your child if he/she hysterically demands another sweet or toy;
• be sure to put him/her to bed for a nap, otherwise the little one will be overexcited by the evening;
• prepare food on time, because children get very nervous when they are hungry.

4. Immediately stop him/her from waving his/her hand towards his/her grandmother or other family members, explain to relatives that this should not be ignored.

5. Teach him/her to express emotions calmly, setting an example with your own behavior. You can't demand adequate actions from a child if the parents are in conflict in front of him, solving problems by shouting, physical actions against each other.

When we are upset, angry, tense, tired, there is a chemical imbalance in the brain. This leads to a deterioration in rational thinking until the condition stabilizes. The task of parents is to teach the baby to act correctly in such moments!

Reasons for aggression in children

It is important for adults to understand the reasons for the emergence of negativity. Let's highlight three main sources of such behavior:

1. Fear, distrust of people around you, the world in general.
2. Manifestation of your "I": defending leadership positions, protecting personal territory, gaining independence.
3. Protest when desires are not fulfilled.

Closer to 12 months, children either experience complete trust in others, or are subject to feelings of anxiety, fear.

What contributes to increased negativity in a baby:

• an anxious mental state of the mother during pregnancy, in the postpartum period;
• absence (excess) of parental love;
• a painful microclimate within the family: tense relations between parents, quarrels destroy the little world, fill a child's soul with fear comparable in strength to the horror of an impending catastrophe;
• bad example of bullies from other people;
• inability of the older generation to correctly establish prohibitions, correctly apply punishments.

Does the child inadequately respond to requests, instructions from adults? Think about how often you say the word "no". Abuse of refusals leads to disobedience of the younger member of the family. "No" is said only when the offspring's actions threaten his life, health, or in the case of a real impossibility to fulfill the request.

How to recognize pathological aggression

Adults should monitor the frequency, degree of aggressive outbursts. Try to find their cause, neutralize the catalyst. If efforts to negotiate with the bully are unsuccessful, and emotional outbursts prevent the baby from establishing contact with others, worsen his general condition, and hinder his knowledge of the world around him, then you should not postpone a visit to a child psychologist.

1. Pay attention to whether the child often breaks play attributes, whether he imposes himself too much on strangers, whether he constantly tries to invade their comfort space, whether he needs continuous physical interaction. Often, children with tactile dysfunction show their needs by pushing, biting, and other types of contact aggression.
2. Think about whether aggressive behavior occurs unexpectedly, in a calm environment, for no apparent reason.
3. Study the baby's drawings, their color scheme, characters, and content. The need for a large amount of black in combination with a negative plot, evil actions of the characters will indicate the presence of a problem that requires correction by a specialist.

Never suppress children by raising them from above. Talk, play with them, pay attention to them, give them love. Be generous with hugs. Discuss conflict situations that have arisen in private, do not get angry, be patient. Teach the baby to express negative emotions with the help of drawing, dancing, modeling, an impromptu theatrical performance with toys. Ask questions about the past day, be interested in the actions of friends, the teacher.

Analyze, perhaps he deliberately attracts you with such terrible behavior? Does the baby have enough attention from his parents?

Consider: physical, psychological suppression of aggression will cause serious harm to the health of the baby. And the inability to correctly express raging emotions will delay the baby's socialization.

Remember yourself as a child, get down to the level of your favorite fidget's eyes and try to understand what's bothering him. Good luck!